were

with Marie and Susanna. My natural fears and apprehensions quickly dispelled by the outgoing generosity and kindliness of wonderful couple. Fears gave way to a sense of "belonging" as I was made to realize that I was by no means alone in my desires. I also met a few other TVs who dropped in and easily fell in with the nat- ural conversation about clothing, cosmetics, mutual problems and ex- changes in experiences. At the same time I learned there was to be resort three weeks hence.

a Halloween party at the

It was during this period that Lee emerged. Endless hours were devoted to learning in three weeks what many women never seem to learn in a lifetime. Every evening was devoted to experiments in making up-I would carefully complete the job, detect a flaw, remove all of it and start again. This process continued until I finally satisfi- ed myself that I had achieved the best possible result for me.

nervousness.

Halloween night at the resort finally arrived. Never before had I ever appeared before others and, despite the knowledge that I was among understanding and sympathetic TVs, I could not suppress my My misgivings about the quality of the transformation were soon dispelled by the extremely complimentary remarks which were made, and I shortly relaxed into a friendly and satisfying at- mosphere. Everyone present seemed to go out of her way to be pleas- ant and put me at ease, and I particularly recall Virginia's inter- est and her helpful suggestions to me about my carriage, mannerisms and other important facets of femininity. After an afternoon of a type of relaxation I had never before known, attired in a full-skirt- ed white daytime dress, white high-heeled shoes and gold jewelry, I returned to my room to freshen up for the evening. I changed to a blue lace over taffeta sheath with full sleeves, black pumps and rhinestone jewels. For this first evening at an "all-girl" party I decided to change my make-up to create a more dramatic effect. It was a glorious evening and a complete success.

My next experience at the resort was an entirely different one. The season was over for the TV crowd, but I had been invited with Vicky to help care for a group of hunters coming for the weekend. Although I had packed for my feminine counterpart, I had no serious plans to dress among "outsiders". Because of my considerable exper- ience with firearms I soon became quite friendly with the hunters and spent some time with them discussing ballistics, muzzle energy, velocities and other technical aspects in the use of weapons. At this point I found myself in a terrible conflict between the consum-

5.